GUEST BLOGGER (Author Connection)

How Reading Stories about Relationships can Make or Break your Own
a guest blog by Gerry Pirani

We've all read a story at least once that's moved us in mysterious ways. Why does a story have so much power? Storytelling is in our genes. As a species, we've learned how to cope with the unpredictability of life, the seeming randomness of it, and the vulnerability we face by telling tales and creating myths. 
Storage Solutions: there's always room for more books in life.

Non-fiction is published by traditional publishers far more frequently than fiction (novels, stories). People buy and read more non-fiction. But why? Perhaps we want to learn something new and not waste our time with imagination. 

But feeling for characters in a novel enhances our ability to have empathy for others. Stories can even help us gain awareness without feeling threatened or resistant. In other words, fiction can be therapeutic. No one's telling you to enhance these skills, it's just happening as a side effect when you read. When it's well-written and insightful, fiction can model better behaviors for us and improve our brain capacity. 

For example, studies show that readers of fiction - and particularly LITERARY FICTION - demonstrate higher aptitude when it comes to relationships. For more information, check out a useful summary in Gabe Begado's article in here. 

In other words, well-written fiction may increase "emotional intelligence." 

So, the theory is this: If you read something that actually increases your emotional maturity and intelligence level, you're more likely to have good relationships. 

That's why it's important we select literature, films, and experiences with discernment. There's an ongoing argument about whether life imitates art or the other way around. Probably the truth is a bit of both. But because stories do hold such power, being careful of what we expose ourselves to, especially the sensationalism of negative or abusive versions of love, becomes imperative.

Yes, there's so much out there to choose from when searching for a book! Which is a great reason to find a good book reviewer whose opinion you respect just to narrow down the options. 

Over the course of the series The Search for Intelligent Life on Earth, my goal is to share a more meaningful approach to human relationships and a more adult (emotionally mature) interaction between lovers. The characters don't start out that way, of course. It's a learning curve.

This doesn't mean that the sex or relationship is bland. On the contrary, they get better and better. And isn't that what most of us want for our partnerships?

The concepts are in line with the themes of my blogs over the past few months, but the series demonstrates the growing pains when putting some of these ideas into practice. 

For communication skills in intimate relationships, check out my blog page here.


About my Guest

Gerry Pirani is the author of The Search for Intelligent Life on Earth: A Story of Love, which is available now on Amazon and Barnes and Noble and is the first in a series of stories about love, sex, and relationships. The search for meaning fuels this first novel about a group of young men as they attempt to navigate their way through life and relationships. Sequels are in the works. Pirani's characters have been called richly complex and irresistible, as the novelist has studied human behavior for millennia. For readers 18 and up. For more information:  

Check out my list of book reviews including my review of Pirani's novel, The Search for Intelligent Life on Earth, to help you find your next read! 


  1. I have experienced this in my relationship too. Eventually I decided to be a bit more careful about who I allow in my head. I'm glad I can grow my "emotional intelligence" while reading because that's what I love to do. I wonder if someone has studied whether or not readers make the best marriage partners. I was just wondering.

    1. Thanks for reading and commenting. That is an awesome question and I'd like to think that readers would make better marriage partners :))) That's a great question to explore!

  2. I have experienced this too, in my own relationship. I had to be a bit more careful about who I allow in my head. I'm glad to know that I can grow my "emotional intelligence" from reading books because that's what I love to do. Does anyone know if readers make the best marriage partners?


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